- Be honest with each other. Honesty is key in any relationship, but it’s especially important if you’re doing long-distance. It might be tempting to push doubts or worries under the rug, but that’ll just put off the problem, and might even make it worse. Being honest with each other will keep your lines of communication open, and help you both to trust one another.
If you’re worried about your relationship, for example, you could say, “I feel like we don’t talk as much as we used to, and it’s been hard for me. I miss hearing your voice every night.”
It’s especially important to talk to your partner if you’re questioning whether to keep the relationship going. Say something like, “I’ve been thinking a lot, and I’m not sure about doing this anymore. It’s been really hard on both of us and I don’t want to put either of us through that.
- Work through tough times together. Every relationship experiences some bumps in the road, but they can feel harder to move past when you’re not with each other. When you’re feeling frustrated, annoyed, confused, or upset, it’s important to talk to your partner about it and work through it as a team. Figuring out a solution or a compromise together can be hard, but it will reinforce the strength of your relationship in the long run.
Don’t cut off communication while you’re working through tough times since it could create more problems.
- Let them lead an independent life, and have your own, to show your trust. Not being with your partner all the time might make you start thinking about them or pining after them even more. Instead of allowing this to spiral into trust issues, or dedicating all of your free time to talking to them, try to let each other develop your own lives, just as you would if you were together. Pursue your hobbies, try new things, spend time with friends and family, and let your partner do the same.
Staying busy will also help get your mind off of how much you miss your partner.
Tell your partner who you’re spending time with so they don’t get jealous.
- Talk about your future together so you know you’re on the same page. If you’re in a long-distance relationship, there’s a good chance you consider it a long-term relationship as well. Most people don’t attempt long-distance unless they know that their partner, and their relationship, are worth it! Still, it’s important to make sure you’re both in agreement on where your relationship is going. This isn’t an easy talk to have, but it’s crucial to keep your relationship strong and honest.
Say something like, “I wanted to talk about where this is going, long-term. I really think we can make this work, even doing long-distance, and I think our relationship deserves a chance, but I want to know where you’re at.”
Try to have this talk before you start long-distance if you can.
Determine early on in the relationship if either you or your partner is willing to move. That way, you can determine how long you’ll be apart before seeing one another full time.
- Review and celebrate your relationship often. A long-distance relationship can be hard, but you wouldn’t try to make it work if it wasn’t worth it. Every few weeks, take a moment with your partner to talk about all that’s going well in your relationship: your feelings for each other, the values you share, the ways you make each other better people.
You can also take this time to take stock of the not-so-good parts of your relationship. Talk about the last argument you had, going over what caused it and how you might have prevented it.
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